


Just Breathe

by Phoenix2319



Category: Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Caretaking, Cuddling, Depression, Doctor Visits, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Venom, Established Relationship, Gender-Neutral Venom Symbiote (Marvel), Hugs, Licking as a sign of affection, M/M, Medication, Mental Health Issues, Mild Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, No Smut, Non-Binary Author, Other, Symbiote Hugs, Therapy, They/Them pronouns for Venom (Marvel), Trans Eddie Brock, Trans Male Character, ftm eddie brock, trans author
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:48:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28373409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phoenix2319/pseuds/Phoenix2319
Summary: Depression rears its ugly head, Venom wants to eat it. Eddie patiently explains that depression isn't a physical thing that can be eaten. Cuddling and burnt pancakes ensue.No smut. Eddie is Trans. They/Them pronouns used for our favorite symbiote. Venom will always be a gender-less wonder in my eyes.
Relationships: Eddie Brock/Venom Symbiote
Comments: 9
Kudos: 117





	Just Breathe

For a while, life passed in a hectic blur. Long enough for Eddie to forget what it felt like. Long enough for Eddie to forget what the symptoms were. His other would prod him when he spent too long being silent in one place, asking him what was on his mind. Venom was always sweet about it, so sweet Eddie forgot to worry about it. But distractions could only work for so long. 

They had been in Eddie’s (trashed) room for the better part of three days, only getting up occasionally to go to the restroom. But since he hadn’t consumed anything that need slowly dissipated too, leaving him sleeping fitfully on and off in his darkened room. Venom had only assumed he was feeling “Under the weather”, a silly phrase which meant that Eddie was sick, but not deathly. The last time Eddie had said he was under the weather, they had been in bed for four days, but Eddie had physical symptoms of being sick; Fever, sniffles, back aches and chills, even V had a hard time holding form, felt like the strength was sapped from their form. And, Eddie had gotten up more frequently to eat and take baths when he wasn’t sleeping, that time. This was nothing like that.

**_Eddie.._ ** Their voice boomed in a raspy gravel. He couldn’t tell if it was only in his head or if V was actually speaking out loud. **_Eddie, We need food._ **

Food. Eddie didn’t want to think about food. Food meant leaving the apartment. Food meant having to actually track down some asshole to eat, which meant human interaction, and the thought of that was making Eddie’s stomach squeeze. A warm fluttering feeling passed over his abdomen as Venom investigated the source of stress hormones. Eddie remained silent, much to his others annoyance.

**_Eddieeee~!_ ** Venom whined. **_What’s wrong with Eddie?_ ** A small appendage with opal eyes bobbed into the pathway of his vacant gaze. It wasn’t an accusation, not meant to poke fun or hurt. It was simply a request to understand. Eddie’s eyes attempted to focus, but when they couldn’t, he shut them with a clench of his jaw. 

_Depression, Love._

He could feel his Other’s confusion pulse through them as they tried to understand the new word. Eddie didn’t feel like he could even explain it through words- didn’t have the energy to- so instead, he pushed images and feelings through their bond.

A gut wrenching feeling of sadness and numbness simultaneously paired with the first perspective vision of Eddie curled up in his bed sobbing while someone pounded on his door yelling; Images of Eddie looking at his chest before his surgery, which Venom had seen before, but these were tinged with a different kind of hurt than the one Eddie had labeled as “Dysphoria”. Many more small moments and general feelings of weight and pain flashed by, seemingly blanketed by a grey tinge. Venom visibly gaped, their small snake like head dropping its jaw to reveal just one row of needle like teeth.

**“Eddie?! What is this? We don’t like this, Eddie.”** They nuzzled into their host’s neck, leaking tendrils from Eddie’s skin to wrap around him like a netted blanket. Eddie wrapped his arms around the bulk that started to form against his chest. Venom had regulated their temperature to slightly warmer than Eddie’s in an attempt to soothe him. It seemed to be working. It was minuscule, every time Venom spread their tendrils or tightened their grip, the stiffness loosened ever so slightly. Eddie still seemed to be wallowing, lost in his head so far not even his mate could follow the trajectory of his thoughts. But the touching seemed to be helping. The intimateness of being intertwined was always soothing to their Other. Venom formed a semi human shape, mostly head, arms, torso, a thick squiggle of mass formed a tail like appendage that wrapped around Eddie’s legs. The man now gripped onto them like they were drowning, causing Venom to rumble and stroke a clawed hand down Eddie’s sweat soaked back. They weren’t sure what was so wrong Eddie was unable to explain it with anything more than past experiences pushed through their bond, but they were going to fix it. Soon enough, Eddie fell asleep, and Venom slowly extracted his main mass. They were careful to place a pillow in Eddie’s arms and coat him in themself before floating to the living room and opening Eddie's laptop. They had a new word to research.

//

When Eddie woke up, it was to the smell of burnt pancakes. He cracked his eyes open to find a worried looking black noodle in front of him, a cute little crease pinched between V’s opal eyes. There was a plate lying on the bed in front of him, only, what was on the plate didn’t look like pancakes so much. Eddie thought about the “No food in bed” rule, but after looking back to Venom’s eyes, he decided not to say anything. There was also a full glass of water on the nightstand, next to a bottle of pain pills.

**“Eddie..?”** Venom questioned cautiously.

“M’ alright, Vee.” Eddie roused, looking back towards the water. Venom slid a tentacle back and handed it to him without breaking eye contact, his opal eyes still crecented in worry. Eddie took the glass gratefully and avoided eye contact while he gulped down his glass, but Venom's snake like form drifted into his line of vision again.

“ **Eddieeee…!** ” His other chirped in delight at hearing his voice, nudging underneath his chin and letting a purr rumble through them. “ **Eddie is safe, Eddie is okay.. Is Eddie sad?** ” Thin tendrils seeped from Eddie’s skin and gripped him in a warm, full embrace. He dropped his head onto the mass of his symbiote that could have been called a shoulder if it weren’t wriggling around so much. 

“I… I’m not sad, Vee. I think… I think my depression is back.” He finished softly. He felt his other flit through surface memories to find meaning, but all he found was the ball of pain that this “Depression” formed in Eddie’s chest. Only it wasn’t a physical ball of pain, and the only way they knew how to soothe it was by forcing Eddie’s muscles to relax.

“ **Can’t find it Eddie.. Can we eat it?** ” They pulled back and formed a fuller face, head cocked and their massive tongue lolling out. Eddie chuckled softly at the silly expression.

“I mean.. No, I don’t think so. It's like.. It’s like dysphoria, except it happens because my brain isn’t making enough Serotonin, not because my body doesn’t fit.” Eddie explained, his voice still hoarse despite chugging a glass of water. Venom spread across him in the form of a thin second skin and gave him their best impression of a cheeky smile.

“ **_Really_ ** **, Eddie? We think you fit just fine.** ” Vee gave him a slobbery lick up the side of his face, causing the smaller being to giggle and writhe in their hold.

“Cut that out! I fit you just fine because you mould to me, dummy.” But he smiled and wrapped his arms around the warm soft mass against his chest. He sighed and melted into the familiar embrace. Venom’s hugs were borderline magical. It could have something to do with the fact that they were joined, cell to cell, but sometimes Eddie truly believed there was some otherworldly magic attached to Venom’s affection. Eddie melted further into the hug for what seemed like hours, eventually Venom was nudging him back awake and withdrawing slowly. 

“ **Eddie, eat.** ” Vee nudged him towards the plate of cooling burnt pancakes, which he could now see were slathered in Maple syrup and on the verge of disintegrating. But you know, that's just how Eddie liked his pancakes: soggy, sweet, and made with love.

_Fuck._ Eddie shook his head with a small smile.

He pulled the plate into his lap and began shoveling food into his mouth to distract him, but it didn’t distract his symboite. Venom watched him curiously, wiggling their tendrils over Eddie’s body softly. A stray drop of syrup caught the curve of Eddie’s bottom lip, Venom slithered their thick tongue from between their teeth and kitten licked the droplet off with the very tip of their tongue. Eddie almost choked on his mouthful of food, batting his hands wildly at Venom to push them back; though trying to distance yourself from something that was literally attached to you was moot.

“Vee! *Ack!* S-space!” Eddie shouted, the plate of stickiness luckily had not spilled in his lap. Venom wriggled their form that was still blanketed around Eddie and cocked their head. If they had eyebrows, one would surely be cocked. 

“I **t was going to get on your clothes. We know you don’t like being sticky.** ” Venom explained, their toothy maw curling into a cheeky grin.

“I know baby, I know, just.. Maybe not with your tongue next time, okay? There are no towels here, you made more of a mess than the syrup.” Eddie sighed, taking another big bite of soggy pancakes, making sure to lick his lips afterwards so as to not leave any tempting stray drops. Venom may have had a retort but they kept it to themself. Eddie finished his meal in peace, he went to put the plate back on the nightstand and go back to sleep, but Venom snagged the plate from him with a long tendril.

“ **Lets watch a movie, Eddie.** ” Venom insisted.

“Yeah, okay bud.” Venom engulfed him and hulked their way through the small doorway, plate in hand. They didn’t give Eddie back control of his own limbs until they had successfully created a nest of blankets and pillows on the couch, so when they melted back into his skin, he was perched in a bundle of softness. 

“Thanks Vee.” Eddie mumbled, a blush covering his cheeks. The remote was placed in his hand and Venom coiled around his torso and limbs, resting a small head on his shoulder.

“ **Mhmm.** ” They rumbled back. Eddie felt them practically purring in his stomach, giving him warm butterflies.

“Ah, er, any preference?”

“ **Action! We wanna watch humans killing each other!** ” Venom practically vibrated Eddie off the couch with their excitement.

“Heh, okay bud.” He scrolled through his movies until he landed on a director's cut of some not-historically-accurate roman war epic. That would keep Vee entertained for at least four hours, allowing him to sleep. Eddie kept his eyes open for the first few minutes, listening to the soft hum Venom's internal:

**_Why are these humans talking so much? They have offended your Queen, slay him where he stands! Wh-! He’s letting him walk away! Eddie?! Why did he let the human walk away?_ **

Eddie smiled sleepily and let his eyes drift shut.

_I dunno Vee. Politics probably. Gotta give the guy a fighting chance or the king or whatever looks bad._

The feeling of the tendrils wrapped around his skin was intensified with his eyes closed. Venom was never still, their matter held a constant shimmer while also being completely solid and also goo at the same time, but now it felt like a gentle vibration. Like he was in one of those vibrating beds at a sleazy motel.

**_Bah, politics._ ** Vee grumbled in his skull. **_On Klyntar, politics are nothing more than strength ranking. The stronger one is, the more in charge of things they are. That man would have been slaughtered on the spot._ **

_Well, aren’t you glad we don’t do things like that here?_ Eddie thought back. _Would have been a really lame movie_.

Venom chuffed a sort of chuckle that made Eddie feel tingly inside and out.

**_You are correct in that._ ** Venom gave Eddie’s body and affectionate squeeze, making their other moan softly before succumbing to exhaustion yet again.

//

Venom coiled uncomfortably in his diaphragm when he walked into the clinic.

**_I don’t like this place. Smells like.._ ** Flashes of pain echoed in their bond and swirled images of Venom being vibrated apart from him at the hospital assaulted his mind.

“Woah buddy.. Hang on. This place isn’t like that.” Eddie soothed softy, brushing his hands down his arms in an attempt to caress his other under his skin.

**_Promise?_ ** Venom sounded on the fence about it and Eddie could feel them prepping to take control of his limbs and hightail them out of there. Miraculously they made it to the elevator without incident.

_I promise bud. It’s like.. It’s like this:_ Eddie pushed pleasant memories of talking to therapists after being put on the right meds. Venom settled slightly, but was still tense. 

Eddie checked in with the old woman at the desk and sat down in a corner chair in the lobby, which was blissfully empty at this time of day. He picked up a magazine and started jigging his leg with nerves.

**_If this place is safe, then why does Eddie feel so nervous?_ ** Venom inquired, forming a small mass into Eddie’s palm in an effort to hold his hand. Eddie sighed and sat back, abandoning the magazine.

_It’s always nerve wracking to intake with a new psychiatrist. Some doc’s are really shitty-_

Images of people in lab coats from the Life Foundation filtered through their shared mind.

_Yeah kinda, though hopefully less corrupt. Mostly you just run into people who want to label you as drug seeking because you’re asking for help and have some semblance of what you need, or sometimes they don’t know I'm Trans and they get shitty about that._

**_But Doctors removed your breasts and provided Testosterone?_ **

_Well yeah, Vee. Some are good, that’s what I was getting at. But often it takes time to find the good ones that can actually help you. So I guess I’m just nervous about starting that search again. Because every Doc that isn’t a right fit can make things significantly worse. And even ones that aren't dicks but can't help you slow down the process a little bit.  
_

Venom tightened a tendril around Eddie’s wrist and finger, squeezing possessively.

**_We will eat them if they hurt you._ ** V stated with such sincerity it caused an audible giggle to bubble past his lips.

“Yeah, okay buddy.” He murmured, sparing a glance at the old woman at the check in desk. She didn’t seem to be able to hear much past the glass dividers.

**_You do not think we are serious, but we will protect Eddie at any cost._ **

“No, I know you’re serious, but we do not eat medical professionals that are 1) just doing their job, and 2) trying to help.”

**_What if they are a doctor that kills people Eddie? Can we eat them then?_ **

_A bad guy for eating is a bad guy for eating Vee, doesn’t matter what they do for a living._

Venom seemed to be satisfied with this answer.

//

Eddie ran his hand through his hair as he walked into his slummy apartment, locking the door behind him and hanging his keys on the hook. He pulled the bottle of pills out of his pocket and they rattled loudly in the quiet of the kitchen. He leaned against the counter and read the instruction packet that came with it

_“Take one by mouth in the evening with food. May cause dizziness and nausea. Do not operate heavy machinery.”_

The basics.

He glanced out the window into the setting sun of the evening, then at the clock. He’d take them at 9.

**_“What are they, Eddie?”_ ** Venom snaked a tendril down Eddie’s arm, forming eyes to peer at the orange bottle full of small dots of tablets.

“Medicine. Antidepressants to help my brain make the chemicals it’s not making.” he could feel Venom’s confusion ripple through them. 

**_“Your brain is not broken, Eddie.”_ ** They insisted, and Eddie felt the odd sensation of Venom flowing over and through the muscles of his brain, as if doing a systems check to prove they were right. He stroked a finger down the soft inky texture between the tiny head’s eyes and smiled softly at his Other.

“Maybe not physically, Love. But it’s not… You know how you say my feelings taste like things?” 

**_“Yessss,”_ ** The tendril on Eddie’s arm thickened and more of V’s mass pooled onto the counter. Memories ranging from Eddie laughing softly at a comic strip to the exquisite pain/pleasure threshold only Venom was capable of taking him to flashed into the forefront of his thinking, and the rush of possessive pride swelling from Venom in recalling it left Eddie breathless and gasping against the counter.

“Um…” He rasped.

**_“You have very tasty feelings, Eddie. We like consuming them.”_** Venom growled, growing into a hulking torso from the puddle of goo on the counter, looming over Eddie with a wicked assimile of a grin, tongue lolling out. It took a few more moments for Eddie to catch his breath, his other waited patiently. They enjoyed overwhelming their Eddie.

“ _Vee_!” Eddie whined, sinking forward into his other and trusting them to catch him. “We talked about this. No showing me sexy-times all of a sudden.” V chuckled.

**_“In public~”_ ** Venom clarified, and Eddie cursed his clever symbiote for finding that little loophole. 

“Y-yeah, well anyways. There’s a chemical that my brain doesn’t like to make. I think it's called serotonin? So anyways, my brain might be like, physically fully intact, but it’s not… Functioning properly. Not emitting the correct chemicals at the correct times, if at all. Brain and hormone sciences are still pretty archaic compared to everything else, so I dunno how much better to explain it.”

Venom stroked a clawed hand gently through Eddie’s hair, pulling their other tighter against their chest.

**_Not broken,_ ** they insisted through the bond, pushing warmth and love towards Eddie and spanning their form down his legs and around his hips in a veiny spider web of comfort. **_Eddie is perfect, he is_ ** **ours.**

The human sighed and went boneless in Venom’s hold, trusting them implicitly to catch him. The exhaustion from the full day of talking to doctors and making appointments hitting him all at once. He was so _tired_. Tired of everything. But a squeeze and quiet rumble from his symbiote reminded him that there were things worth fighting for. 

Worth _living_ for. 

He and Venom would get through this **together**.


End file.
